RefLecTioN

Writing about two of my favorite stories seemed like the best idea ever until I realized that the two stories did not have very much in common. After sitting down and brainstorming and re-reading over the texts, I was able to come up with some similarities between the two dramas. At first, it seemed like I was on the right track and that I knew where I was going with my paper. Unfortunately, I had lost all train of thought and became stumped. Once we did the workshop in class, I was able to get some positive feedback and some insight as to what I should further do with my paper. However, I became stumped again and realized that my thesis was not that strong because all my information was going against my thesis. It had occurred to me that I did not fully comprehend the deeper relationships between the “21 Steps” and “A Street Car Named Desire”. I re-read my essay over and over again, then I started to brainstorm over and over again, going through both texts line by line to see if I could find something to help strengthen my argument. Sadly I found nothing.
“21 Steps” appeared to me as if there was no deeper hidden meaning or symbolism in the text. It was especially difficult to analyze because the perspective was told in first person, and he was the only character the reader could identify with or even analyze. The other characters were too flat to analyze. Aristotle and Ponytail, however, could be analyzed to an extent, but it would all be assumptions based on their actions. There would not have been enough textual evidence to support any argument about the two. I found that story more for enjoyment of literature than finding a deeper meaning. To me, the story was more suspenseful than anything. I thought about changing stories, but I realized I did not want to write about another piece of literature that I did not feel that strongly about because I would only end up in the same situation, which was “writer’s block.” The other pieces of literature that I liked, I had already written about and I did not want to write about them again because I would have no further insight.
In “A Street Car Named Desire,” I found a lot more meaning and utility. Because the characters were not as flat as those in “21 Steps,” I found that they were easier to identify and analyze. There was just a whole lot more complexity in the play such as the reoccurrence of music from the jazz clubs, Blanche’s issue of lighting, racial and gender inequality.
After much debating with myself, I decided to write the opposing argument that both pieces of literature were actually two very distinct dramas. I re-analyzed both texts from a different perspective and found even more evidence to support my argument. I also realized the reoccurrence of the color white when referring to Blanche’s clothes, which immediately reminded me of the poem “Design” by Robert Frost. However was not able to fit that into my essay because I figured that the essay would focus more on “A Street Car Named Desire.” Also reminded me of the story “Bartleby,” and the poem “Diving Into the Wreck,” although I was not quite sure why at first. Then it occurred to me that Bartleby was considered an outcast who was not quite all there mentally and Blanche was considered an outcast as well. At the end of the play, Blanche goes to the mental hospital as well because her family believed her to be not mentally well. In reality, I think they were both just two misunderstood people in their society. I could also associate the story with “Diving Into the Wreck” in terms of the ladder/ making a transition, as exemplified in my essay. I also found interesting that I was able to relate the poem “Design” to “21 Steps.” However, I found that incorporating my ideas from my blogs were harder than I expected because most of them were poetry related, which meant that the quality of the blogs were not that great. (Not because I did not try hard, but because I had a difficult time interpreting the poems.) The transition between the blog and the essay felt awkward because I was not even sure if I was doing it right. Then I realized later today that I don’t know how to cite a footnote at the bottom of a page, and the MLA website was not very clear, but I tried to follow whatever instructions they gave me.
As I started to write my essay, I realized that I had limited space to write down everything I wanted to say and realized I might not get to write down everything. I truly felt that I could have written a whole essay on “A Street Car Named Desire” because I found so much information while reading and analyzing it. But at the same time I remember you always saying how less can be more. Although the essay may seem to be more focused on “A Street Car Named Desire” still. After finishing my essay, I figured it was time to revise and/or re-write my introduction to make it stronger, especially since I had built a solid foundation for my essay. Nothing seemed to come to mind, but at the same time I knew that my intro was not as strong as it could have been. I tried to take advice from one of the workshop revisions on my rough draft, but, it did not seem to flow very well with the paper.
Overall, I really enjoyed this assignment, because I have come to realize how I had grown as a reader myself. In the beginning of the quarter I was absolutely horrible with analyzing literature, but now I feel more comfortable analyzing and it comes way easier than before.


The Link:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xenEseHCWY

Antigone

The beginning of Sophocles’ “Antigone,” opens with the scene of Antigone and her sister, Ismene, discussing and debating about the death and burial of their brothers, Eteocles and Polyneices. Previous to this occurrence, Eteocles and Polyneices battled for the throne of Thebes, which resulted in both their deaths. Because he defended Thebes, Eteocles was given a proper burial, which is a crucial ritual in Greece in order to pass peacefully into the realm of the after life. Polyneices, on the other hand, attempted to invade Thebes, and was left to rot and die without a proper ceremony as was ordered by Creon, uncle to Antigone and her siblings and the new king of Thebes.
Against Creon’s wishes, Antigone decides to honor her brother Eteocles by giving him a proper burial and argues with her sister that Creon’s proclamation could not prevent Antigone from justly burying their brother. She states “At least he is my brother-and yours, too, though you deny him. I will not prove false to him…It is not for [Creon] to keep me from my own” (lines 50-51). Antigone’s idea of defiance suggests that she is a very family-oriented girl. The fact that Antigone is willing to disobey the law for her brother’s burial takes a lot of courage, dedication, and selfless love to her family. Usually, one would jus sit around like Ismene and let things be, but because Antigone decides to take action proves that she feels very strongly about the matter of her brother being left to rot. Ismene reminds Antigone of their family misfortunes and the fatal consequence that would take place if anyone were found burying Eteocles. Antigone responds by stating “It will be good to die, so doing. I shall lie by his side, loving him as he loved me; I shall be a criminal- but a religious one. The time in which I must please those that are dead is longer than I must please those of this world. For I shall lie forever. You, if you like, can cast dishonor on what the gods have honored” (lines82-89). The fact that Antigone anticipates on dying implies that she has nothing else to live for and would rather die to honor her family than to live while they are shamed. In fact, it almost seems like she is looking forward to dying so that she can reunite with her family for all eternity where they can all live peacefully in the underworld.

Bartleby's Facebook

If Bartleby had a Facebook I would imagine it to be pretty plain, but with lots of insight to his thoughts on life. Firstly, his picture would be a head shot from an upper diagonal angle that would barely show his face because it would be covered by his emo bangs/ hair. He would have pale skin because he never goes outside and he wears all black to blend in with the darkness. This is the only photo he has. His facebook status would be a philosophical quote by Nietzsche saying "All truth is simple... is that not doubly a lie?" He would change his quote whenever he felt like writing. His favorite quote is "I would prefer not to." Bartleby has ten friends at the most because he is pretty antisocial and most of his family is gone. His friend list consists of his fellow video gamers/ stoner friends and his coworkers (Nippers, Turkey, Ginger Nut, and his boss). Because of this interesting and depressing fact, a lot of his news feeds and status updates are empty. His interests would most likely be staring into space and thinking about life while staring at walls, being stoned and playing video games. He would listen to experimental electronica and harcore death metal. He wouldn't watch T.V. or movies because he would see no point to them, especially since mainstream has gone downhill and has lost all meaning. Farwell to Arms, by Ernest Hemingway is one of his favorite books. The religion he would claim is athiest. There are no tags, pokes, groups, or unneccessary fun applications. Facebook is more of his outlet to express his outlook on life and confesses some of the traumatic experiences he went through at his old job, Dead Letter Office and with his late family. Lots of curious strangers review his blogs, and all usually say in some way that he is a "crazy psycho and weird." There was only one person who understood him, and if you look back on his past wall entries you can view their conversations. (His only friend died of eye cancer.) Eventually these blogs would stop because his boss sends Bartleby to jail for refusal to leave work.

Diving into this Poem Revised

Do you remember your first period or your first wet dream? It probably arosed some terror, confusion, and a hint of excitement, but it was just welcoming you into puberty, or the coming of age. Puberty, for most people, was an awkward stage in their lives involving acne, hair growth, and physical developments. Just because your body is physically maturing does not mean that you are emotionally. “Diving Into the Wreck,” by Adrienne Rich, tells a tale of a young girl coming of age who awakens to find that she, and everyone else, is diving into the unknowns of life itself and exploring adolescence while making the transition into adulthood.
In the beginning of the poem, the narrator seems uncertain about who she is. She exemplifies this by describing her gear, or clothing, as “absurd,” “grave,” and “awkward” (1,6-7) and she states that she is venturing off all “alone”(1, 12). These words, in context of the poem, have a negative connotation, as though the clothes she is putting on are unusual and uncomfortable. Her ambiguity resembles the same attitude of a child coming of age. When one comes of age, their body begins to change as a response to puberty, and a lot of teenagers may feel “awkward” or feel that they look “absurd” because they are still adjusting to how their bodies are functioning. Due to this transition, many adolescents begin to feel insecure and as though they are alone because their bodies are changing at different speeds than others. Lack of confidence coupled with fluctuating hormones can often cause loneliness. That emptiness can translate into curiosity and internal confusion about life in general, and how everything around them functions and remains interconnected.
In the first line of the poem, the narrator refers to a “book of myths” that she had read. According to the dictionary, myths are “misrepresentations of the truth”. Seeing as how she is a young girl beginning to blossom into a woman, she has heard the many details of adulthood such as sex and drugs. Instead of listening and absorbing to everything she hears, she wants to explore the adult world and find out for herself what is factual and what is fictional.
The poet then mentions a ladder that hangs off the side of the schooner. The ladder is the trigger to the narrator’s transition into uncovering who she is. Figuratively, and generally, a ladder is supposed to help one move upwards or progress towards a certain target of interest. However, the narrator uses the ladder to move down into the ocean, which is a little contradictory to the concept of a ladder and therefore suggests conflicting ideas. As young adults, people like to question authority and society, and when those thoughts begin to occur, people's outlooks on life and towards them selves begin to blur. It becomes difficult for them to determine what is right and what is wrong, what it is to be considered acceptable and what it is to be rejected. These conflicting ideas that occur internally cause many teenagers to behave in a disfavoring manor and act out by means of rebelling, acting obnoxious, or even causing physical and/ or emotional harm to oneself. Unfortunately, this downward behavior is a necessary process in order to achieve maturity,
The transition continues into the next couple stanzas. The further the narrator travels down the ladder, the closer she comes to attaining adulthood. Becoming of age is a process that gets harder before it gets easier. It can cause a lot of emptiness and confusion, which would explain the reasoning for the narrator to compare herself to a “cripple” and “…an insect” (3, 8-9). She also came off slightly disoriented when Adrienne Rich stated “and there is no one/ to tell me when the ocean/ will begin” (3,10-12). When one is crippled, it usually means they are disabled, or unable to move. The lack of motion Rich was referring to was the narrator’s inability to further progress through a certain time in her life. Her immobility caused the narrator to feel small and insignificant to the world, like an insect, adding on to her insecurities and loneliness. This time she feels more alone because there is no authoritative figure to guide her or instruct her through this time. There is no one to tell her exactly how she is feeling, so she feels as though she cannot be helped. She, like all teenagers, has to find her sense of direction and learn responsibility and all the other traits of growing up. Adrienne Rich begins to transition her character's emotions in the next stanza.
Rich begins to use the fading of color to describe the direction of the narrator’s emotion. She starts off with blue, which has a gloomy and miserable association, and increasingly moves toward black, which usually has a negative connotation. Once the narrator is in the dark she feels most powerful, so powerful that she describes it as pumping through her blood. Usually, one would feel more lost and alone in the dark because they become blind to most things due to their inability to see. However, the narrator turns her weakness and her vulnerability into something beneficial that empowers her and fuels her to become better and stronger. By doing so, she is proving to herself and the reader that is overcoming her fears of the unknown and is ready to advance to the next level in life, which would be growing up.
Eventually, the narrator comes to a realization in stanza eight. This is where everything comes together for her and she becomes enlightened. She claims that she had found a place (8,1) and then refers to herself as a woman and a man in the form of a “mermaid” and “merman” (8, 2-3). The place she is referring to is the time and place that she figures out that she is not alone and that everyone, both men and women, undergo what she has experienced at one point in their lives. That is when the change of using the word “I”, referring to single and alone, to “we,” implying unity, begins. In the last line, Rich goes back to using the phrase “I,” however, the context is different because Adrienne Rich uses the colon symbol, which also represents a ratio to suggest and/ or prove that both woman and man are alike in this journey in life.
In the last stanza, Adrienne Rich wrote, “We are, I am, you are/ by cowardice or courage/ the one who find our way/ back to this scene/ carrying a knife, a camera/ a book of myths/ in which/ our names do not appear” (10, 1-8). By restating the first stanza in a different tone and perspective, Rich was trying to emphasize the metamorphosis in the narrator. The narrator no longer viewed herself as awkward and alone. Instead, she found out through cowardice and courage the truths of the myth and figured out that she is not alone and was never alone on her journey through early adulthood. Rich claims that their names do not appear in the book of myths because the book of myths applies to nobody specific, but to universally everybody.
Growing up is often a difficult stage in one's life. It is filled with insecurities and emotional isolation, which results in questionable thoughts and behavior. Adrienne Rich was able to capture this stage of life and compare it to a deep sea adventure, diving into the unknown abyss, by which she means life. Although we all struggle with life individually, we are all experiencing the same emotions and inner conflicts just like the rest of the world.

Diving Into This Poem- Before

Diving into a wreck could have a couple of meanings. One of them being “diving” into a problem and trying to find a solution. The other meaning could be venturing out into the unknown. Seeing as how Adrienne Rich was a feminist, both definitions would be most appropriate for this poem. Although the poem may appear to be about a woman deep sea diving to uncover a “mythical” ship filled with treasure, it’s true meaning is of a girl coming of age and awakening to find that she, like her fellow women, are living in a society dominated by males, and wishes to prove that females are equivalent to males.
In the beginning of the poem, the narrator seems a skeptical of certain aspects in life. The poem opens up stating that she is embarking on a journey to find out for herself whether or not a myth is true. The fact that she has to figure it out on her own provides evidence that she is uncertain about something. She also refers to her diving attire as “ absurd,” “grave,” and “awkward” (Rich). These words, in context of the poem, have a negative connotation, as though the clothes she is putting on are unusual and uncomfortable. At the end of the first stanza, the narrator makes a claim that she is alone on her quest. Her ambiguity resembles the same attitude that a young woman reflects when she is trying to understand her place in the world.
Rich then mentions a ladder that hangs off the side of the schooner. The ladder is the trigger to the narrator’s transition into uncovering who she is. Figuratively, and in general, a ladder is supposed to help you move upwards or progress towards a certain target of interest. However, the narrator uses the ladder to move down into the ocean, which is a little contradictory to the concept of a ladder. The fact that Rich uses the ladder to go down instead of up suggests conflicting ideas. As young adults, people like to question things such as authority and society, and when those thoughts begin to occur, people tend to discover mixed feelings about the world and their identities. The transition continues into the next stanza when Rich states her “flippers cripple [her]” as she is beginning to submerge into the sea where “there is no one to tell [her] when the ocean will begin”. As she goes deeper and deeper into the ocean, the narrator becomes overwhelmed with freedom and a new feeling begins to take over which changes the tone of the poem. The colors she sees when she goes deeper into the ocean fades darker and darker until it turns pitch black, like the unknown that was referenced before. All of a sudden, she feels powerful and free from superiority. Her “mask is powerful/ it pumps [her] blood with power” (Rich). She again refers to herself as being alone and claims that she has to learn how to “turn [her] body without force in the deep element” (Rich). Even though the narrator feels full of authority, she feels that she must be able to resist male superiority in her society, otherwise she will no longer feel liberated, and be forever trapped by man.
Remembering why she began her journey in the first place, she began to explore the wreck. In this context, the word wreck has a double meaning. In the poem, the poet is literally referring to the shipwreck that she had been searching for. However, the poet is also referring to the internal wreck that she finds within herself when she is struggling to find her beliefs. Later, the narrator claims to find something more permanent, which is referring to her take on life and society as well as the ship. Rich uses the words “damaged,” “worn,” and “threadbare” to describe the ship, which is describing how the narrator feels about herself in society.
The narrator then finds a place. This is where everything comes together for her and she becomes enlightened. It is then she begins to equal not only herself to man when she calls herself a “mermaid” and “merman” and claims “I am she: I am he” (rich). It’s also unique that Adrienne Rich would use the colon symbol, seeing as how it could also represent a ratio, by further proving the fact that women are equal to men. She even takes it a step further and considers all women equal to men when she switches from the phrase “I” to “we.” Throughout the rest of the poem, she does not refer to herself as singular, but as an entire unit, male and females alike,
In the last stanza, Adrienne Rich wrote, “We are, I am, you are/ by cowardice or courage/ the one who find our way/ back to this scene/ carrying a knife, a camera/ a book of myths/ in which/ our names do not appear.” By restating the first stanza in a different tone and perspective, Rich was trying to emphasize the pride she has for her sex and the lack of recognition that women have received in past and current events. She felt that women should be equally rewarded as men in order to be treated fairly.
Adrienne Rich was clearly a feminist as she had plainly expressed her feministic opinions of how women should be equally treated as men through a poem about deep sea diving and exploring into the unknown in order to find something more for her own self satisfaction during the time period of an ultimate sexist society.

iN a STaTioN oN THe MeTRo

At a first glance, not many people would consider Ezra Pound’s “In a Station on the Metro” a poem considering the fact that it contains only two lines. The poem does not have stanzas, let alone a meter. There seems to be no complexity what so ever. Because art is so abstract, there are no real qualifications of what makes a poem a poem. Now-a- days, one could slap the first twenty words they could think of together and call it a poem, regardless if there is a hidden meaning or not. Quite arguably, Pound’s two sentences can be considered a poem because it’s not only abstract but it contains vivid imagery and rhyme.
In the first line of the poem, the word “apparition” popped out at me because it’s not a common expression one uses to describe people. I imagine ghostly figures walking around with no specific destination or purpose except to walk. Like humans, apparitions also have distinct faces, but because they are just faces in the crowd they have a certain emptiness in their face. In other words, they lack personalities.
The word “petals” in the second line was the second image I saw. Petals are usually very vibrant in color, and easy to spot from far away, especially against “a wet, black bough.” Petals are also associated with flowers, which are one of natures many beauties in the world. So perhaps Pound was trying to describe the beauty or the essence of all the different passengers’ faces that he passes by everyday in the metro. Like a flower, everyone has their own unique look about that sets them apart from everyone else.
Even though the poem is only two lines, there is still a rhyme to it. There are similar sounds in the words crowd and bough, specifically the “ow” and “ou” parts. Although this poem is missing many other components that you would normally find in poetry such as a stanza or a meter does not make this any less of a poem. In fact, the simplicity and imagery of it is what makes it unique and abstract.

DeSiGN

The poem “Design” by Robert Frost illustrates a spider preying on a moth, which had the misfortune of being entangled in the spider’s web. This occurrence was made possible by the use of camouflage on a heal all. Frost describes all three beings--the spider, the flower, and the moth--as appearing white. Usually, the color white symbolizes purity, beauty, and innocence. However, the use of the color white in this poem was used to assist a spider in killing a moth.
Seeing how the poem is titled “Design,” I believe that Frost wanted to express how everything in life is interconnected through a physical trait. The white heal all for example, was an innocent bystander of the trapping and killing of the moth, It had no part what-so-ever in the actual killing of the moth, nor did it have a choice, but because the plant was conveniently white, it became a pon in the spider’s plot to trap its food. This tainted the flower and made it the spider’s accomplice and therefore “guilty by association.”
The moth was also the color white and most likely intended to use the heal all as a safe resting place against its predators by means of camouflage. Ironically, the moth’s method of protection was used against it and resulted in its own death. The connection that intertwined the spider, the moth, and the flower’s fates was the fact that they shared a common trait of being white.
Originally, I thought that the spider had a negative connotation because it was being associated with death. Although, reading through the poem over and over again, I realized how unusual it was for Frost to describe the spider as “dimpled” and “fat” in the first line. Usually, one uses those words to describe something cute, friendly, and innocent, like a child, instead of using them to describe an aggressive creature such as a spider. After contemplating over some time, it occurred to me that it is in a spider’s nature to catch an insect in its web and feast upon it. I started to think that the act of the spider was not intended to be perceived as an act of evil, but an act of nature. If that is so, then the spider needed to look out for its own interest and find a niche where it would be easy to prey on its victims. Seeing as how the spider is white, it would be profitable for the spider to hide in an environment similar to its appearance, such as the white heal all. Thus, this is where the design aspect comes into play and unites the three characters of nature.

New Beginnings/ Change

College is the next chapter is most people's lives. It allows them to create a whole new life for themselves because college is supposed to be the place were they discover who they are. I, like many of my peers, am starting a new journey in my life. I have left everything I know back home to become an insignificant freshman in a small, unfamiliar town. I will be forced to make new friends and be held accountable for my own actions. I will admit, I was a little intimidated by the very thought. However, I started to see the perks of college and decided Davis is where I will embark on many new adventures such as join the outdoor adventures club, learn how to salsa, study abroad, socialize and work together with a lot of unique personalities, as well as some other things. There are so many opportunities to take advantage of in college that it is difficult to pick- and-choose which ones I want to try first. Through these various activities I know that I will gain more knowledge about life and about myself. Now that I am on my own, I am starting to realize that there are a couple of bad habits that I need to break. There is no more parental figure to wake me up in the mornings, to remind me to take care of business, or to push me and stop procrastinating. If I am late or I miss a deadline, there is no one to be held accountable except for myself. In college, I am going to learn how to better manage my time, how to be a responsible student, and how to keep myself motivated so when grades come out I will not receive shocking news. Eventually my lifestyle will change and even my interests, which will force me to change as a person. Even though I may not realize it, I am constantly growing as a person. Hopefully I will come out of college as a mature, responsible, cultured, independent woman prepared to take on the world.